Been hearing some young ladies making posts on how scared and discouraged they are about having babies, because of the horrible things they've been reading about childbirth/postpartum on a trend posted by someone who needs help..Tension everywhere!😄🤣
Yes, the main poster of that trend looks like a damaged woman who needs help but doesn't even know it,& people around her don't know this too! She needs to have a therapy session with a professional! Argue this all you want! Sha get her help if you're close to her!
Now back to the topic, biko my dear ladies who ARE TRULY INTERESTED IN CHILDBEARING, kindly never let anything or anyone discourage you! Everyone doesn't have such horrible experiences with childbearing! Why do something a second time if the first experience was as tragic, terrifying, horrible, traumatic and scary? Why so much self-hate? Yet they did it more than once,even thrice..smh
Pregnancy hormones affect people differently, and it all boils down to your mindset! Are you emotionally ready? Are you happy with the father-to-be of the unborn child? Do you truly wanna have a child because you crave being a mother? or you just want to have a child because you feel you owe your husband a child, or you owe your mother or MIL a grandchild?
Your reason for having a child would determine how your pregnancy, childbearing and postpartum journey will be! Remember,just like marriage, everyone must not procreate! It's okay if you don't want to. There's nothing wrong with your decision dear. All you need to do is find someone who wants same thing as you,or ready to compromise for you. And live happily ever after!
You don't wanna get married,but just wanna have kids with someone? There are others like that too. Find them and do you! You just wanna have kids on your own without a partner or commitment? Fire down! You wanna get married but don't wanna have kids? There are people that want same too! Etc! By all means find your type and do what makes you happy!
I had my first baby via vaginal delivery, and had my second baby via CS delivery! So I have experienced both deliveries and cannot say the experiences are what i can discourage anyone for..or dislike or hate any of my babies for a second for..no way! Your body will definitely experience some changes to adjust to the foetus growing inside you! Each discomfort is what you get through positively and looking forward to the day it will be over and you carry your baby in your arms someday. The joy surpasses the pains and discomforts! It's unexplainable! It's called BUNDLE OF JOY for a reason!
If you have sense of responsibility, you won't nag or complain over the stress and pains of pregnancy, childbearing and postpartum and ignoring the joy and fulfilment of carrying that baby and bringing it into the world finally and nurturing it to become like you! You have that stressful job that the salary isn't even worth the pains and stress you go through! You have that horrible relationship you get abused in,cheated on,lied to,maltreated,battered, disrespected,hurt so badly countless times,yet you look forward to getting married,right? But because someone somewhere or some people who weren't ready or who gave birth for the wrong reasons are sharing their negative trends you now wanna start having second thoughts about having a baby😄🤣 wehdone ma!
Love yourself enough, take care of yourself..your body, your soul, your brain..be happy while you're breathing..do it for the right reasons and enjoy the amazing journey of motherhood..from conception to labour and delivery to postpartum.. it's all in your head and mind! You control your hormones, emotions and feelings how exactly you want them to be! Do exercise and feel good! Get therapy and heal! Love yourself and envy nobody! Be kind to humanity and watch yourself handle the journey as top fun!
Prepare yourself and your nipples towards lactation and breastfeeding, and enjoy a painless breastfeeding journey! Most of y'all don't research! You only use your data for gossip blogs and irrelevant things online. You don't read, you hate reading! You don't search Google to study certain things about the decisions you make. You rely on what someone else say, maybe your pastor or your mother or MIL, to get through..the minute you miss your period and know you're pregnant and decide to keep it and have the baby,is the minute you're supposed to start researching and reading about it all! But mbah!
That being said, having these two cubs is the best decisions I've ever made in my life! Raising them with love and everything I've got is also part of the best decisions! The bond and love we share is out of this world. I've never seen it elsewhere! Every blessed day i go for school runs to pick them up, the way they rush to jump on me and kiss me excitedly,you would think i traveled since and just got back! You wouldn't believe I'm same person that dropped em off in the morning! Same person they see everyday oh! Sometimes i tease them saying NA ONLY UNA GET MAMA ABI?😄😄🤣
My kids are very happy kids! They love each other! Look out for each other! If Odogwu is crying,Kamsi would rush to ask what's wrong and tell him sorry and pamper him.. even if she's asleep and hear her brother's cry, she jumps up from sleep to check on her brother..On the other hand, when she's crying,he must rush to touch her face and tell her sorry and hug her! Their love and bond dey give me joy! Unlike our childhood days,one person would be crying and the sibling would be busy telling you NTOOR/MMEEH🤪🤪 and laughing at him/her!😄😄😄
Never for one day have i felt any form of regret or hatred for my kids, right from conception to this minute! My love for them is new every morning! They're the most beautiful and adorable creatures i see on this earth! From the first time I saw them on scan results to the first time i saw them during delivery, they've been beautiful and so adorable in my eyes! If sometimes you feel sad or regret or angry towards your kids or towards being a mother in the first place, please you need to get therapy. You are not alright dear!
I'm here to encourage you that wish to be a mother someday, THAT YOU CAN DO IT! Don't let a broken person discourage you! Everybody's experience differs! Not everyone had or has a rough and negative pregnancy and childbirth and postpartum experience! Yours can make the positive list! If you are scared or worried, please be sure to get help before embarking on the journey! Get THERAPY from a professional counselor! Read up, read up and read up oh!!!
If your sexual hormones seem dead after childbirth and healing, get help from your mindset,a therapist and get some aphrodisiacs to spark up your system..spice things up and try different stuffs with your partner! Communicate with your patner! Their support and understanding and patience go a long way to get things back to normal or even better! It's all in your hands! But if you have a partner that isn't supportive, patient, understanding,you need therapy! You both do!
Nobody should coman be ranting like they were forced to have kids on social media when in the real sense they're broken & damaged! Get help and trust me,you will rewrite your experience in a way it won't even discourage anybody dear! No matter the pains and discomforts and stress, childbearing and child raising remain the most joyous and fulfilling experience of a woman that wants it! Most of y'all are just in it for the wrong reasons and with the wrong sperm donors dear! 🚶🏾♀️🚶🏾♀️🚶🏾♀️🚶🏾♀️